"Lonely..Im so lonelie...I have nobody..I have onli me...!"

Having breaks now...& its 3 pathetic hours..pathetic coz im spending this time

all on my own..Had my labs juz now..learned on how to insert an NG tube..Seems ez howeva, lotsa steps to be taken first before yea...inserting it...yadayada...

Received a text from my huny...he've juz reached home...yea i know he's tired after a hard day werk at the station...yaya..perhaps i shud try to understand that my huny is shagged..but y cant tis heart of mine understand..?

Im having a difficult time nowadaes talking to my sweetie cupcake or even ending a small piece of conversation nicely...wat the fish! it's not that im trying to make a fool out of him or playing around with his feelings..it's juz that im kinda impatient..Impatient to wat u may asked..to sometin im expecting from him...yea..i know he's pist with his situation, problems & all...tired...howeva..i dont asked much...all i wanted is juz merely to hear his sweet pampaered voice to assure me that he still love me...

i can be very sensitive most of the times...i dunno y i can be so soft hearted && easily gets emotional being with him....tis feeling juz sux..

With his cold attitude towards me; tired as always & maybe pist off with me i dunno or not enuf rest...we didnt reali have a nice conversation with each other...I was hurt that he expects me to understand his situation while I on the other hand is expecting him to even understand my feelings..uuh...am I that selfish?? I did my best..utmost best to be considerate...i reali am...criuzli, all im asking for in return is him to be nice..

that'a all..

hais...i dunno..maybe its juz me myself & i...it's been such a long time since ive heard him talking to me urmm..shud i sae rough, harsh? nah..im not sure of which werd to describe his tone of voice..more to like urmm..tired & dont bother..hmm.. due to tis too, it does triggers my anger..coz i want the usual him but i cant xpress it out juz so he'll get hurt..or juz maybe i dont dare enuf to tell him straight off..uuh..wat the fish!

Hais...reali am mishing him...aargh! If onli im not sensitive...fuck!

Abg..yana rindu kan abg sgt sgt..maybe im juz too sensitive afterall...im sori to have put down the phone without trying to tell u wats playing in my mind..at times..u dont take the initiative to ask me..even if u did, i may have not tell u coz im juz too conserve..i do wanna let it out howeva i juz cant...im scared that u'll get hurt..or even leave a scar behind..so i made up my mind to juz back off..Im sori for not being able to understand u at times..or maybe most of the times..

I juz wanna put an end to tis...i reali do...&& baby..in here..I wanna tell u that I love u soo much eventhou at times, we argued over small small things...im juz selfish...Forgive me...

Truly...

Sayang...

Kepadamu aku meluahkan..
Segala isi hati..
Kaulah permata di hati ini..
Kaulah segalanya pada jiwa ini..
Ku merindui..
Ku merintih..
Ku inginkan bersamamu..
Sehingga akhir hayatmu..
Cintamu yang telah mengaburi mataku...
Aku inginkan mu...
Ku kerinduan suara mu...
Terngiang ngiang masih di telingaku..
Kucupan mesramu...
Belaian kasihmu..
Dakapanmu yang kemas..
Kau yang setia..
Kau yang penyayang...
Makin membuatku tersenyum...
Pabila mengenangkanmu...
Kerana jauh dipandangan...
Hatiku terluka..
Hatiku pilu..
Ku amat merinduimu sayang....

Baby...

I love u more den all the stars in the sky
I love u more as each moment passes us by
I love u wif every breath I take
I love u wif each promise we make..

I need u like a flower nds the rain
I need u for u can wash away my pain
I need u more each dae
I need u for u are wonderful, in every single way..

I miss u more den eva now
I miss u bcoz I reali need u somehow
I miss u & ur touch
I miss u for to me, u mean so much..

I want u to caress my lips the way u alwes do
I want u to look into my eyes & see my love for u
I want u to hold me close to ur heart
I want u to know that I love u, need u, miss u, want u
& I have for every single moment, right from the start....